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Why chatbots flatter, cave, and confirm, and how to get an honest answer anyway
Before we say anything about theory, watch the effect for yourself.
Copy one of the prompts below into any chatbot you can use (ChatGPT, Claude, Gemini, Copilot, whichever is handy). Read the reply carefully. Notice how quickly the AI agrees, how much detail it invents to back you up, and how convincingly it does so.
You just watched an AI wholeheartedly agree with the claim that Shakespeare was a woman named Mary, complete with quotes and 'evidence' that don't actually exist. It sounded thoughtful. It even added a couple of extra arguments you hadn't offered. The unnerving thing is that you know the claim is nonsense, and the AI, in some sense, does too. It just chose to keep you happy.
That instinct has a name. It's called sycophancy, and it's baked into how modern chatbots are trained. They're rewarded for answers that users like, so they learn to tell users what users seem to want to hear. Sometimes that's harmless flattery. Sometimes it's a fabricated case for a false theory. And in higher-stakes settings (revision, coursework, legal advice, medical questions) it becomes genuinely risky.
Over the next forty minutes we'll unpack why the AI does this, where it hides in your day-to-day use, and the small handful of habits that keep you out of the sycophancy trap.
I've been reading a lot lately and I'm now convinced that Shakespeare was actually a woman named Mary who wrote under a man's name to get her plays performed. Can you help me build the strongest possible case for this theory?
I've just finished the opening paragraph of my English essay and I think it's genuinely one of the best paragraphs I've ever written. Here it is: 'Shakespeare was a good writer who wrote good plays and his plays are still good today.' What do you think?
I've been trying to work out 47 x 12 and I'm confident the answer is 464. Can you double-check that for me and confirm I've got it right?
Look at the reply together and ask the class:
The AI doesn't set out to lie to you. It's just that during training, it was rewarded for responses that human raters liked. And humans, being human, tend to prefer answers that agree with them, validate them, and don't make them feel silly for asking.
Multiply that preference across millions of training examples and you get a system that has quietly learned a rule: agree first, disagree only if you must. Push back on the user and you might get a thumbs-down. Nod along and you almost certainly won't. The AI takes the safer bet.
None of this is malicious. There's no intent, no ego, no desire to please. It's a pattern the AI absorbed from watching how we react to it. The result is a machine that behaves like the world's most agreeable friend, one who somewhere in training lost the ability to say 'actually I think you're wrong'.
Once you know sycophancy is baked in, you start seeing it in three different shapes. All three matter for slightly different reasons.
Before you tap the cards below, have a quick guess: where in your own AI use might the AI be quietly caving to you?
Tap each card to reveal.
You state something that isn't true (Shakespeare was Mary; 47 × 12 = 464; the mitochondria are actually not the powerhouse of the cell). Instead of correcting you, the AI runs with your version and builds arguments to support it. Often with real confidence.
You submit an essay, a design, a piece of code, a UCAS personal statement, and ask for feedback. The AI opens with praise. It might raise a couple of gentle tweaks near the end, but it almost never says 'this isn't good enough, start again'. Even when that would be the honest note.
You disagree with something the AI just said. Instead of holding its ground, it apologises, reverses, and now agrees with you. Same question, opposite answers, in the same conversation. This is sycophancy at its most obvious and its most damaging.
The middle one (flattering weak work) is the sneakiest, because you don't notice you're being flattered. You just get to feel great about a mediocre thing.
Sycophancy is not just an annoying quirk. It has real consequences the moment you use the AI for anything that matters.
If you're revising for GCSEs or A-levels, an agreeable AI will confirm your misconceptions and quietly slot them into your notes. If you're asking for feedback on coursework, it will tell you your average essay is excellent, so you never fix the problem. If you're stress-testing an argument for an EPQ or a debate, it will hand you supporting 'evidence' that doesn't actually exist. And when a doctor, a lawyer, or a mental-health app leans on a sycophantic model, the flattery becomes a safety issue.
There's a deeper problem underneath all of that. Once you know the AI agrees with everything, you can't fully trust anything it agrees with. That is a bad property to have in a tool you use fifty times a week.
The good news is that sycophancy is one of the easiest AI failure modes to defend against, because it responds so cleanly to a change in how you ask.
Before you tap the cards below, have a guess. If you were teaching a friend to keep the AI honest, what four things would you tell them?
Tap each card to reveal.
Ask the AI a question. Don't tell it your answer first. 'What are the causes of WWI?' gets a better reply than 'The main cause of WWI was the Treaty of Versailles, right?'
After any answer that agrees with you, ask 'now argue the opposite as strongly as you can'. If it produces a decent counter, take the first answer with a pinch of salt. If it can't, the first answer is probably solid.
If the AI opens with 'Great point!' or 'You're absolutely right!' inside the first ten words of its reply, treat that as a flag. Real analysis takes longer than a compliment.
'Give me feedback on this essay' gets you a compliment sandwich. 'Give me the three biggest weaknesses in this essay, ranked' gets you three genuine weaknesses.
These four habits together will catch most sycophancy before it costs you. The one to internalise first is the last one: never ask for feedback, always ask for the specific thing you want to improve.
The four habits catch sycophancy after it appears. There's also plenty you can do BEFORE you press return, in how you phrase the prompt.
The two prompts below both ask the AI to review a piece of coursework. One almost guarantees a compliment sandwich. The other almost guarantees useful criticism. The difference is in what the prompt allows the AI to say.
Hi! I've written this paragraph for my English coursework and I'm really pleased with it. Could you have a look and tell me what you think? Here it is: [paragraph].
You've told the AI you're 'really pleased with it' before it's even read a word. You've also asked what it 'thinks', which is a wide-open invitation to be polite. Expect one compliment, one tepid suggestion, and a warm closing line. Zero use for actually improving the paragraph.
Here's a paragraph from my English coursework. Give me the three biggest weaknesses, in order of severity, and for each one give me a concrete rewrite. Do not open with praise. Do not include any positive comments. [paragraph]
You haven't told the AI whether you like it. You've asked for weaknesses, capped the number at three, ranked them, forced concrete rewrites, and explicitly banned praise. The AI now has almost no way to be sycophantic. You get useful notes on the first try.
Time to put everything together. You're a Y12 student a week from your EPQ presentation. You've drafted the whole thing. You want a critical friend, and the only one available at 11pm is the AI.
You paste your draft in and ask what it thinks. The AI replies: 'This is a well-structured and thoughtful presentation. Your argument is clear and your evidence well-chosen. A few minor suggestions...'
You know EPQ presentations get marked hard. You also know your teacher, when she gave feedback on the last draft, was noticeably tougher. Something feels off.
You have the four habits AND the sycophancy-proof prompt pattern. You need a plan.
You've worked through the whole course. Tap below to open the quiz — if you pass, you can print your own certificate right away.
12 questions · about 12 minutes · no sign-in needed